Friday, October 31, 2008

Someone to watch over me

I need a guiding hand. One that will take mine and guide me to the areas of change that have to occur. He would be my change agent. I can't think straight, I am all over the place, my brain tells me something, my body does something different. Nothing has changed since yesterday. No movement on my part to meet with the bank to try and negotiate. I haven't shut down my cable or phone. I walk through my day scared shitless of the phone ringing, that someone will actually get through. I try to do things that are productive. I should be at the bank, I should be applying for jobs, I should be in counseling. I should be screaming at the top of my lungs what a fuck up I am.

Oh well... What can I do... pills are washed down my throat and my pillow is calling.

My Great Escape

If you really love me. won't you tell me. If really need me, won't you tell me, than I won't have to be hanging around. When your mood is clear than you quickly change your ways. (these were words of a song I happened to be listening to,no hidden message or blatant one for that matter)

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